I ate my wafer...


I’m terrified of public speaking.
What else can I compare it to…it is more scary than standing in Hillsdale Street with nothing but a radio and the townies. , practicing stall-spins or feeling the claustrophobic squeeze of tunnel walls forcing short rapid breaths. . I suppose we all have our demons, and this one happens to be mine. To paraphrase Dave Barry, we all have embarrassing memories that, when they raise their heads, cause us to consider killing ourselves with the pen/pencil/screwdriver/BBQ fork we have in our hand. The majority of mine involve public speaking…the damn intro to theatre project where I erroneously thought that I didn’t need to memorize my speech, various things from high school, etc.

I was very surprised a couple of months ago when I mentioned this to a couple of my closer friends, who, though present for a variety of times where I thought that my utter fear was apparent (the science and ID CCAs, Fairfield, etc) didn’t see it. Frankly, I thought they were being considerate at first, but apparently not. Also, I’m not afraid to argue, or talk in small intimate groups, in fact I rather like to. In fact, I suspect, the angrier that I am, in effect, the larger the group I feel comfortable talking to (Intelligent Design CCA).

So this leads to the present problem: I have a mock appellate argument to delver on Saturday morning. There is also a practice one on Wednesday. It is in front of an odd numbered panel of “judges” (practicing trial lawyers and judges). I represent the plaintiff in a 1st amendment case, and speak first, for 13 minutes, followed by 15 minutes from my opponent, then 2 minutes of rebuttal. Since there will be ~ 20 people in the room, I’m hoping that mentally I can construe it into a small intimate setting, and argue well. Unfortunately, I also know that it is supposed to represent an argument before a court of appeals. It is rather obvious that we are supposed to take this very seriously, what with 2 months to prep for it, formal attire, etc. In any case, between it and the 30 page paper this week involves a great deal of pressure!