I ate my wafer...

2/18/2005

Mr. Wazoo, with some slight help from the Cooks has retold one of the best stories of all time, well, at least the more tasteful and printable parts of it. Probably if I were plied with beer, I would tell it with those parts thrown in, and include some more amusing side stories, such as Mr. Mahlon Adolphus Benson IV spraying beer out of his nose, certain inedible muffins, and how an inoccent high school student was nearly beaten to death.

Oh and for the rest of the post:

A. Mr. Wazoo might find women to go with his beer more readily if he wasn't "drinking cheap Mexican Beer". Women like men that have taste buds, and they might want to drink some of YOUR beer if you drink something decent.

Here's some free beer advice, unless dealing with an experenced beer drinking woman, try Young's Double Chocolate Stout; or get a fruit flavored wheat beer AND a sweet tasting porter or stout, then consider mixing them; Black Velvets, Black and Tans...remember Guiness is actually low calorie and low alcohol (~Budweiser), a possible selling point...

B. I'd like to think that at least a couple of times, *cough*, I've plied my friends with homebrew in order to help them in amorous situations. If beer is an Ark, does that make me Noah? If so, I'm feeding the animals I don't like to the ones that I do.

8 Comments:

  • Nice Bob.

    ...kind of interesting having a girl who can drink you under the table...

    ...oh, up on cripple creek...

    By Blogger Finite, at 10:10 AM  

  • I happen to be listening to a lot of the Dylans at the momement (both Bob and Jacob), so the Cripple Creek reference is sort of cool. I'm not sure Dylan wrote that, or someone else after The Band stopped working for/with him. I bet , Mr. Walking VH-1 special can tell us...August?....August?....August?

    Oh, and I've decided that Trappist monks are cool. I love the Bread, Cheese, and Beer Combo, which is another method Mr. Wazoo can use in his beer-related wooing: http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art28131.asp

    By Blogger Bob, at 12:41 PM  

  • Yes, and no...I definitely poured several glasses of a rather mediocre weizbier that evening for both parties involved, including some deliveried to you on the roof.

    But yes, that was mostly High Life, you just were the first person I could think of other than...a certain former roommate of mine, and his maritial status makes me uncomfortable bringing that up.

    By Blogger Bob, at 2:18 PM  

  • Nothin' wrong with a woman who knows and loves her beer. Bob, you are right perhaps if Wazoo was imbibing a higher quality spirit he might have a better chance with the ladies. Booze and shoes are the way to judge a man.

    By Blogger TheAmber, at 4:37 PM  

  • Uhh... Leroy, may I suggest that you don't allow holes in your shoes? Or keep her drunk so she doesn't notice, but then again, if she were to be drunk under a table, she might notice. So bad plan. Unless she were too busy or something. And yeah.

    And yeah, Bob, "Up On Cripple Creek" was written by Robertson... good call.

    By Blogger August., at 3:41 AM  

  • Amber, you judge men by their Shoes? Interesting. Care to explain?

    By Blogger Bob, at 1:33 PM  

  • It is something I got from my parents ... basicly pretentious people (men esp.) in cheap shoes are to be ignored a cast irrevocably into the realm of ASSHOLE. It is a little strange. When I say I judge men by their shoes I don't mean I look down upon men who have cheap (but well cared for)shoes because that is the best they can afford ... I am talking about men in expensive suits and cheap shoes. Those men either don't know any better (in which case they are to be ignored) or assume no one ELSE knows any better (in which case they are to be ignored and maked as assholes). Cheap shose make those who are pretentious and have not earned the right to be.

    My parents spent 15 min talking about Mr. Nunn's shoes ... which were approved.

    By Blogger TheAmber, at 6:45 PM  

  • Interesting.

    As usual, I think I resist classfication on this one. I have very specific tastes in running shoes (New Balance or Montrail, trail running models, with wide toeboxes...and even more so, in Hiking boots (Smooth, one piece leather, Italian Vasque "Super-Hiker" for prefernence)...which combined I probably wear ~70% of the time. My better shoes are very much a mized bad ranging from very cheap to medium expensive.

    By Blogger Bob, at 9:27 PM  

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